THE LAST DINOSAUR

Sometimes I feel like the last dinosaur on earth, the last holdout when it comes to popular pastimes in this self-obsessed cyberworld.  I don't own a Smartphone or a Blackberry and still believe that twittering and tweeting is strictly for the birds. My husband, who has an I-Phone, has become very adept at sliding and tapping his way around its interface and has given me the grand tour, which is very impressive, but to me it's just another thing to learn that I really don't need right now. I have enough trouble keeping up with other things that I started, like this blog - sadly neglected for want of time. So it is with Facebook, another thing I don't get or need in my life.  Friends argue that it's unavoidable, that everyone's doing it, but that's like telling me that the majority of people voted for Rob Ford - not necessarily a good thing.  There's no way to get rid of him. We're stuck with him for seven more months, and maybe more - like the Eveready Bunny - the shame that has no end.

And that's the problem with Facebook.  Everything you post is there for all the world to see.  Do you really want your employer knowing so much about you?  Now, more than ever, when the relationships between employee and employer are less than permanent, do you reallly want your employer peeking into your personal life? "So, Brittany, about those 3 days you had off last November when you had the flu?  Wasn't that you cavorting on the beach at your cousin's wedding down in the Bahamas?"

 However... a couple of weeks ago, join I did - not out of capitulation, but of necessity when someone sent me a Facebook posting that I needed to see as part of research on my book.  In order to view it, I first had to create an account, albeit a phony one.  Since I already had the account, one day, with nothing better to do, I decided to scout around the pages of the people who pop up on the screen and invite themselves to my party or me to theirs, just to see what all the rage and the fuss is about.  Well, I didn't learn much, at least nothing that I didn't already know.  Ho-hum - your favourite music, movies, the fact that you love chocolate and gardenias and the feel of sand between your toes.  Interesting...but wait a minute...if...if I'm your friend, I already know these things.  You've shared them with me in precious alone time, in real time, during live conversation and that's the only way I want to know you - not by some artificial means.

My little walkabout merely confirmed what I already know or suspected.  Facebook provides two things - a chance to brag, or a chance to target someone else, which has become a particular penchant for the younger set of late. Facebook provides you with your very own 15 minutes of fame. Or, put another way, Facebook is the lazy man's version of friendship where all you have to do is click a button and, Voila, you have instant friends that require no effort on your part.  Is that what friendship has come down to - a flick of your finger that has no more meaning than the flick of your remote
 control?   Well, I have news for my friends.  What is it about posting things on-line that you couldn't share with me in person or in a phone call or in a private message?  I could care less about your latest wine tasting or your trip to the store, or your grandkid's cute birthday card.  If I really need to know you can tell me in person.  As for my other so-called friends or yours who pop up beside my picture or your picture, it's really none of my business.  I have about as much interest in their happenings as they have in mine.

 But wait you say, I do care.  I mean, there's work involved.  Why, I have to take those pictures and replace them and fill in my profiile and don't forget, I have to keep it up.  This thing doesn't just magically appear, you know.  It requires my attention.  It has to be constantly updated.  Okay, I get it.  It's a lot of work.  So that's what you do with all your spare time; why you're too busy to return my messages?  I rest my case.  I know - I can always get you on Facebook.  Yeah well, thanks, but no thanks.

Tell you what, though.  You can read my blog and then you'll know the reason why......Cheers.